Why I Love the Roloff’s Podcast

I LOVE BEHIND THE SCENES PODCAST.

Every Tuesday Audrey and Jeremy Roloff release a podcast episode and I’m always ready to tune in, coffee in hand. It took me a while to jump on board with the whole podcast fanfare but this one is definitely a favorite for this year.

I don’t know about you but I tend to look at those with successful ministries, Instagrams, and published books and murmur and sigh … if only I had more talent if only I had a followingif only I had connections

(Pathetic, right?) 😉

Seeing other’s live their dreams and produce content inspires me but it also scares me; insecurity and fear whisper menacingly,

” … they’re meant to minister because they obviously have something you don’t. You’ll never be able to minister like them so why try?”

And that’s why I love the Roloff’s podcast — they share real life and all the messy bits. Behind the laptop screen, Instagram numbers, and published books are two people who are doing the hard work. They don’t have everything figured out; they have messy schedules, unfinished projects, arguments, roses and thorns in their everyday life.

The episodes are super practical which is perfect for me. So far, they’ve talked about forming family rhythms and habits, working with your spouse, entrepreneurial projects, and knowing your personality and using it for God’s glory. (Since I dream of working alongside D one day, I find so much of it inspiring!)

Since I consider motherhood, marriage, and blogging part of my calling and ministry, I love hearing from others about what has and hasn’t worked for them; so far, I haven’t listened to an episode that didn’t leave me some nugget of wisdom to cling to. (I also laugh a lot since they’re so easy to relate too!)

What’s some of your favorites this year? Do you have any favorite podcasts? Leave me a comment below and I’ll try to check it out!

Happy listening!

Frannie

My New Years Resolution for Our Marriage

2019 is the year for a thriving marriage! The past two years have pretty much revolved around our darling little and that’s okay! Between my misdiagnosed miscarriage, constant bleeding, PPROM, bed rest, 7 months in the NICU (while living apart), and then transitioning to motherhood and caregiver responsibilities — life has been crazy! 

And while Dalton and I love each other more than ever I am aiming to make 2019 a year of re-establishing our marriage as #1 priority. 

In effort to grow in our marriage, I am focusing on changing one thing and I think it’s going to be an awesome, life-giving habit! 

I’m choosing to support and complement Dalton’s personality and calling rather than compete against it. 

What’s that look like? Well …

  • Choosing to believe in, pray for, and support, in actions, Dalton’s vision for our family. 
  • Letting go of my expectations and enjoy who Dalton is and what he brings to the world. 
  • Diffusing conflict by receiving Dalton’s reactions graciously (I’ll post more on this later this month).
  • Building trust by being reliable, responsible health wise, and more upfront on issues brewing in my heart. 

When I mean complement I’m not talking about using kind words or flattery (that’s compliment); I’m referring to the dictionary’s definition:

a thing that completes or brings to perfection.

I have a nasty habit of second guessing Dalton and competing against his decisions and vision.

My “needing to win” attitude has caused a lot of unnecessary conflict, hurt feelings, and defensive attitudes. (I love the short article Jeff Bethke wrote about how the need to win will kill any relationship)

Thankfully, I have a loving God Who forgives and changes old thought patterns and sinful attitudes and a patient husband who loves graciously. <3 

This year, instead of fighting against D’s nature, personality, or vision to support them.

What are some of your 2019 goals? Have you chosen a list of resolutions or one word? Leave me a comment below or stop by Instagram. I love to hear from you! 

Love and blessings, 

Frannie

Why Nap Time Needs to be Your Time

In my early days of motherhood, nap time was a stress filled sprint — dishes, laundry, pumping, bottle washing, meal prep, medical equipment upkeep, toilet scrubbing, and bills all demanded my attention. I ran on low trying to cram my long list of to-do’s into the 3-4 hour naps Uriah took a day.

I was tired, frazzled, angst-filled, and guilt ridden because the to-do lists were never fully done.

Thankfully, my sweet, thoughtful, Mr. Fix-it sort of husband encouraged (demanded?) that I either sleep or relax during one or both of Uriah’s naps. He wasn’t keen on coming home to a freaked-out wife especially when the pressure I was feeling was my own creation.

It took several months to adjust to this new expectation — sleep (or rest) when baby rests. I’m a list-maker and relaxing and/or napping during the day made me feel unproductive, guilty, and that I was failing as a mom and wife.

Are you in the same boat? Do you struggle with feeling defeated, exhausted, and frustrated while you try to juggle motherhood and life? You are not alone, sweet mama! We have all been in your shoes. 

I think it’s important to remember that we don’t indulge in mommy time because we want to dull our exhaustion and never ending to-do lists. We enjoy mommy time because it refreshes us, equipping us to love more, feel better, and work harder. Therefore, taking time to rest is important. Mama, make nap time your time!

For me, my avenues of relaxation include reading God’s Word and connecting through prayer, catching up on my current Netflix craze, reading a favorite book, coffee, napping, being creative (blogging or crafting), decorating the house for new seasons, and having a friend for devotions and lunch. I won’t lie, I do tend to clean during nap time but that is because I enjoy cleaning and keeping up our house. But in the early days of motherhood I needed more down time so cleaning tended wait.

Tell me — what are your favorite down times? I would love to get to know you better so leave me your current Netflix craze, relaxation tip, or book? Here’s to you mama … now go take a break! 🙂 

Love and blessings, 

Frannie

To the mother in the NICU this Christmas

Advice to the mother spending Christmas in the NICU or PICU.

I see you … you’re drinking Ronald McDonald coffee you smuggled into your little one’s room sitting in the middle of IV alarms, feeding tubes, ventilator equipment, and nurses chattering in the background. You’re spending Christmas in the NICU, PICU, or surgery floor. 

I see you smiling at your baby — thankful to be with her even if she’s in a warming tank or you’re wearing those noisy isolation gowns.

Despite your smiles I know you’re struggling with tears and questions — why do we have to spend the holidays here? Why do we have to endure this?

It’s okay; I know that your burden is very real and very heavy.

Can I give you some advice as a woman who spent 281 days in the hospital with her baby?

Mama, decorate your baby’s crib. Even in the middle of the storm, you need to find ways to make these days special.

If baby can tolerate stimuli, I hope you sing her your favorite Christmas carols and dress her in the outfit you got at your baby shower.

Eat the extra cafeteria sugar cookie and take a little time to look at the Christmas lights down the street.

Give your husband an extra long kiss before he goes back to work.

Please buy a tiny Walmart tree and set it up in your Ronald McDonald apartment and enjoy the free gifts they leave hanging on your door.

This is your Christmas.

This horrible, exhausting, lonely Christmas is your Christmas and one day it will end.

One day you’ll look back at this season and wonder how the days passed so quickly.

But until then, be easy on yourself. Find ways to make these precious days count.

You need to survive these days just as much as your baby needs to survive. You need to be gentle with yourself — after all, you’ve lost so much normalcy — it’s okay for you to grieve the loss of normalcy.

It’s okay. 

Love and blessings from someone who has spent the holidays in the NICU and PICU

Frannie

Our Simple, Natural Christmas Tree



We like to keep our Christmas tree simple and, as a lover of all things cottage and farmhouse, the goal for our tree decor is to reflect themes of natural, neutral, old-fashioned charm.

Our secret ingredient? Potpourri! 

It all started when we were newly weds and poor as mice. Our tree was given to us by some amazing neighbors who were upgrading. We went to Hobby Lobby but nothing suited our unique tastes and tiny budget so my amazingly creative husband thought outside the box. We came home with this box for $14.99 and after an afternoon of hot gluing Christmas hooks we had a unique and (incredibly cheap!) tree!

Since then we’ve added a few homemade, DIY ornaments and store bought favorites. The tree’s charm and simplicity grew as we added glittery wicker balls from Pier One, wood slices (cut by D himself) with handwritten words, and pine cones which I picked up on an afternoon walk. 

Future goals include making our own dried cranberry and orange sliced garland (see Leah’s for an adorable tutorial!) and catching one of these adorable tree collars on sale! 

I love Christmas time. There’s something so good about it all — the snow, gifts, hot chocolate, family time, shopping, traditions. It’s all so good. — How do you decorate your tree? Are you a clear or colored lights sort of gal? Tag me in your pics on Instagram — I’d love to see your creativity! 🎄

Happy decorating! 

Frannie