How To Properly Pamper Your Partner

Dalton is the warlord of pampering.

Did that come out correctly?

I mean, D has pondered, studied, practiced, and executed the most perfectly planned pampering a girl could receive. He’s the king, the bomb, the warlord of treating me well.

I’ve got you curious don’t I? Well, let me explain.

Occasionally, we like to sanction a day for the each of us where we plan to pamper, bless and spoil the other. It’s a lot of fun. Think of it like your un-birthday that happens whenever we have extra cash in the budget; honestly, we’ve thrown pamper days when we had zero to spend (those days just require a little more creativity). 😉

A few weeks ago we sanctioned two days for our fun and my day came first.

I woke up to the sound of my Beloved leaving the house. I knew he had something up his sleeve! I dressed and tidied the house while I waited for him. He came home with two fresh, delicious doughnuts! I LOVE DOUGHNUTS! He had noticed that I had been drooling over the local bakery’s selection and picked the two he knew I’d like best. What a guy!! 😀 He also finished making my coffee and we settled down for a glorious, slow morning.

I prepped to leave for school when he told me that I’d find something yummy in the car. And there, in the passenger seat, lay a king-sized Reese’s peanut butter package! YUM! I LOVE REESE’S! It was the perfect treat to carry me through my 5 hours of p.e. class in the smoldering sun.

I came home, showered, was massaged and then asked to pick where I wanted to eat. We journeyed on to our favorite Thai place and had a delicious meal. I had two (2!) Thai teas … I think the calorie count of the day was high. But hey, it’s pamper day! It isn’t the same as every other day of the month! 😉

My Darling Man had set several candles throughout our bedroom which made for a very romantic evening … what a guy! (blush, blush!)

Yes, my Man is the king of pampering. And I am one very blessed girl.

But this post isn’t just a brag on D, it’s a how-to for pampering your partner perfectly. Here are five (5!) steps to becoming the best pamperer!

  1. Know your person

Love languages are very real and very easy to follow. I’m a gifts and quality time person so D knows that to really impress me it takes just a thoughtful gift and a little of his time. D is quality time and physical touch. What’s your person’s language? Figure it out and aim to meet it and you will be one step toward perfectly pampering your partner!

(By the way, check out this site if you want to take the quiz and read more about your love language! 🙂

2. Plan Ahead

This *is* important. Of course life is spontaneous and flexibility is key but if you want to perfectly pamper someone a little thought goes a long way. D had figured out my favorite type of doughnut, left a treat in the car and sent sweet texts throughout the day. His thoughtfulness ensured success!

3. Pursue the Heart

When pampering it is important to remember that all of the gifts, time and care you give will pale if you forget to pursue your partner’s heart. This means that it is important to care about their spiritual and emotional needs as well as blessing them physically and maybe even materialistically. D conquers every day because he always cares about how I am doing; he doesn’t wait to pursue me till date night. He pursues my heart always.

4. Be creative

To perfectly pamper your partner you’re going to have to put on your thinking cap and be creative. We’ve done pamper nights often throughout our marriage but they rarely look the same. Variety is fun and meaningful!

I’ve found it fun to plan a theme around D’s day. One day may be movie themed or Minecraft themed (we’re nerds). Another may be all about food (think meals they will love) … I think that day involved taking my guy out for sushi.

5. Don’t be afraid to be cheap

In real life money is tight and you may think setting aside a day for your mate may be costly. Don’t buy that lie, folks! Blessing your spouse (or friend, or parent, or …) can definetly be done with little to no money.

For D’s pampering day I knew the budget would be tight. So, I planned ahead, prepared a menu I knew he would *love* with ingredients we already had on hand and then told him he had $15 to spend on whatever he wanted. I think he bought a small container of icecream, a pizza from Aldis and a watermelon. The rest of the day was spent relaxing, getting massages and enjoying homemade meals.

There you have it — five ways to perfectly pamper your partner. I would love to hear how you pursue and bless your people. Do you follow any of the steps? Or maybe you have your own original recipe for pampering? Do tell!

One very happy girl,


2 thoughts on “How To Properly Pamper Your Partner

  1. Avatar

    How lovely, Frannie. You certainly know how to make each other happy.
    I love to bring my husband a little bag of his favourite Liquorice allsorts if I go out without him…just a tiny treat!

  2. Avatar

    I love that you and Dalton do pamper days and I love your creative ideas!! Stu and I have always given each other special pamper days as well. Sometimes we called them “video game days” because one of us would get to spend the day relaxing and playing their favorite video game (yay Skyrim!) while the other one took care of Laura and brought favorite meals/treats to the pampered spouse. 🙂 Sometimes we would have “date weekends” where we would plan several fun outings like movies, dinner, bowling, shopping and just spend the day together splurging and having fun. Sometimes we would just curl up on the couch and have a movie or TV show marathon. I have the same love languages as you, gifts and quality time, so I love leaving little surprises for Stu to find and planning special little times together amid the busy week. 🙂 You and Dalton have some wonderful ideas and I look forward to using some in future pamper days!

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