Just Be You


One of the greatest gifts my husband ever gave me came in the form of three little words:

“Just be you.”

All my life I’ve been one of those weird follower types, despite the fact that I do have a mind of my own. And I hate it. I hate that I’m so suggestible. Of course, when it comes to life convictions I stand firm. But when it comes to the daily stuff like which cleaning product is best and whether or not Chacos are acceptable in all environments I tend to cave in as others share their thoughts. It’s weird and annoying and uncomfortable.

I brought this up to my beloved more then once and every time he washes my worrying, silly soul with gentle, comforting words.

Just be you.

Just be me.

Me who loves being feminine, dancing and icecream.

Me who has big dreams about mission work yet loves the dear place I call home.

Me who loves to blog yet hides it from real life people in embarrassment.

My most recent worry-fest was whether or not I should raise my hands during worship service at church. I wanted to so badly; oh, I wanted to lift my hands in praise and joy. But my silly, cloying thoughts tackled me. “If you raise you’re hands you’ll look like one of those weird, hippie Christians” or “If you raise your hands you’ll look like a super-Christian and that will get your pride puffed up.” I was distracted from worship with self-consumed, worrisome, silly thoughts. I felt confused that I’d even worry about this.

Later, I shared my predicament with D. His response? An exasperated,

“Be yourself, Frannie! Just be you!”

I’m resolved to be more me.

To be okay with who God made me. To raise my hands when I feel the need to and to be comfortable to say that I’m a stay at home wife and loving it. To share with others that I write a blog without feeling ridiculous.

To just be me and trust that, with Christ, that is more then enough.

What do you think? Do you struggle being yourself? Or are you one of those lion-hearted gals? Share with me how you’ve learned to let go of worry and rejoice in who God made you. I’d love to hear about it!

Lots of love and hot coffee,


// p.s. That lovely photo up there? That was taken by my dear, awesomely-talented friend, Amelia Protiva, at our reception. Why not send some love her way at her blog?

14 thoughts on “Just Be You

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    Frannie, I know just how you feel, as even now, t my advanced age, I find it difficult to do things that make me feel I would be ‘different’.
    What good advice your husband gave you!

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      Oh, Miss Barbara, it comforts me to know you can relate! It can be so frustrating, can’t it? I am so thankful we have time to learn and grow in these things.

      Keep “being you,” Miss Barbara! You are lovely and dear as you are!

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    Love this post! The love of my life would always tell me the same thing – to just simply be exactly who G-d created me to be. He always thanked me for that; it was incredibly encouraging.
    G-d made you perfectly wonderful and beautiful in His image, Frannie! <3 I love your blog and always leave blessed and inspired by your sweet spirit and honesty.

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      Hello, Jenna!!

      Ah!! Is this Jenna from Feminine Farmgirl of long ago? If so … hello, dear!! (And if not I am still so happy you’re hear!)

      Thank you for your sweet comment. That is an encouraging thing and I am so thankful you have been blessed by such a love!

      Many blessings to you, sweet one!

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        hehe, yes it’s me 😉 Your blog is one of very few that I still read and I love it!

        Yes, for a wonderful 14 months I had the privilege of intentionally dating my best friend and soul mate with the intention of marriage. I was exceedingly blessed beyond words even though we had family stuff to work through. As of almost 7 weeks ago, he now isn’t sure if it’s G-d’s will and broke up with me (to be honest, I feel that it is a ton of pressure from his family – I know that he still loves me and desires marriage). I have experienced joy to the full and now the bitter taste of “death”.
        G-d continues to confirm in my heart that Clay is the one that I am created for, yet it seems silly as this is a very hopeless season of not communicating…but I can’t give up hope to marry the man that I have prayed for the past 4 years and the one whom I love with all my heart. I’m praying for this season to be used as much growth in both of our lives and that in His perfect timing (may it be soon!) He make our being together perfectly clear to Clay and our families as well. Trying to trust and pray during the pain!
        Whooops, I just kinda wrote you a book of my struggles. I apologize – you don’t have to publish this comment 😉
        Much love to you – thank you for being an incredible inspiration to all of us gals on blog world and also to all of your friends and family around you. You are precious.

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          Oh, Jenna!!

          How *very, very* happy I am that you’ve left your mark and gotten in touch with me! I can’t express how reconnecting makes me feel!

          And I’m also blessed and honored by your opening up about your current situation with the love of your life. (By the way, if you wish this to be private please let me know because the comment automatically went through and I wasn’t sure how to respond but by keeping it public; let me know 🙂

          What a hard season you are enduring! A time of wanting, lacking, hurt, hope, and the possibility to grow in wisdom and grace and beauty. I am blessed by your enduring, sweet attitude. It would be tempting to “throw in the towel” or become bitter but press on, dear sister!

          Press on knowing that even bad things are in GOD’s gracious hand and that your plight and sorrow and hurt are well within HIS sight. You are loved, Clay is loved and both of your families are loved. Sometimes, though, relationships (and there are so many during these times) have a hard time blooming but God’s great will *will* prevail.

          Ah, now I’ve written you a book. 🙂

          I look forward to keeping in touch; If you’d like, feel free to email me at: authenticvirtueblog@gmail.com . (I know I was horrible at responding last time … but I’ll try better now! 😉

          With so much love!

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    It is such a joy to read your blog. You are a wonderful person inside and out and you shine in your Christian life, your married life and your blog life. You just need to shine on.

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      Miss Mary Jane — thank you for leaving this comment!

      What sweetness!! I so appreciate your encouraging words. I hope you know how wonderful you are and meaningful your friendship is!

      I appreciate you!

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    Oh my! I just said to my sister this evening that one day the “real me” is going to come exploding out of me when I’m at work or in class, and everyone around me will be completely flabbergasted because they had no idea all that was in there! 🙂

    Truthfully, I haven’t yet learned how to integrate what I consider to be the “real me” into my daily life very well. I tried once to open up to a coworker and explain that underneath my smiley, uber-helpful exterior, I’m actually quite blue and melancholy; and unfortunately, I found out later that my story had telephoned through several people and turned into my becoming “mean” and “awful” when I go home each day. 🙁 So for now, I continue to be plastic and always happy. And I cherish the very few (read: 3) people around whom I can let go and be my “real” self.

    I love you, Frannie, and I wholeheartedly agree with D.’s assessment. Let the world benefit from the joy, sweetness, faith, and creativity that is uniquely you!!!

    I love you, dear friend!

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      Oh, Vickie!! It never ceases to amaze me how well we relate; and I am so sad about the telephone line forcing you back into plastic-ness. I do understand though; I hope you find your way into “just being you” — I know that in doing so you’ll bless, benefit and lift so many of those around you.

      I, for one, am so glad for knowing a glimpse of the “real you” and will keep hoping that that inner circle of three people will grow into so much more simply because you, as you really are, are more then enough.

      With so much love to you!!

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    Oh Frannie! What a perfectly timed reminder. This is something I struggle with too. I’ll admit, not quite as much as I used to. Justin has been a blessing in helping me overcome the discomfort I have with myself. But seeing that he loves me, for being me, has given a confidence I don’t think I would have otherwise had. But it is still something that pops up on an oh too regular basis…

    Be that beautiful, feminine, dancing, ice cream loving gal! GOD created YOU with those desires, and like and dislikes. And everything HE has made is beautiful. 🙂

    Have a wonderful day, my sweet friend! You are enough. 🙂

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      Such sweetness! Thank you, Angel, for your dear words of encouragement! I always appreciate your reminding me to rejoice in the LORD Who does all things perfectly! (Including designing us!) HE is so good!

      I appreciate you, dear lady!!

      p.s. You enjoy your little folk of chickies!! I *love* how in love you are with them. So cute!! (Plus, they are lovely!)

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    goodness can you read my mind?!! from the having my own mind yet being a follower (mostly out fear and past experiences) to the hiding the blog thing are all my struggles. My husband has been amazing at gently prodding and reminding me to be me. That is what people want! He tells me to discover, to learn and be confident in me. Though at times it feels like it people really aren’t looking for copies of other folks, they want authentic 🙂 real people. Both unbelievers and believers are looking for real and raw not perfect. but the struggle to become that isn’t so easy! grateful for God’s grace and love and my husband encouragement and love! Thank you for sharing! (& I agree about Amelia’s amazing photography!)

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      Oh, Charis, I love this.

      It blesses me so much to be able to relate to fellow bloggers and friends. 🙂 And I agree. that people want *authenticity* … believers and unbelievers alike.

      I am so thankful you have a man who loves you like Christ and encourages you to be you. I don’t think there is anything better then that. 🙂

      I appreciate you and your honesty!!

      Lots of blessings to you!

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