For my Dearest Friend

“There is no
friend like the old friend who has shared our morning days, no greeting like
his welcome, no homage like his praise; fame is a scentless sunflower, with
gaudy crown of gold; but friendship is the breathing rose, with sweets in every
–Oliver Wendell Holmes
Who has been the
visible angel in my life? The one who has spent countless nights counseling and
praying with me? The one who has taught me how to be joyful and who has
encouraged me to follow God? There are many who have done well in this world;
many who I love and respect.

But it is my dear
mother who has seen every side of me and still loves me anyway.

Happy birthday,

You are so special!
this picture? Find it here.


God, this is a
beautiful time and I am so glad to be your daughter.

I know feelings are
like waves—undependable, quick to move—but at this time I feel like a patch of fresh
daffodils breaking out in the dawn. I feel like a plum tree full of white
blossoms; that is, I feel that these growing pains are okay and natural. That I’m
at rest and at peace with who I am and Who You are.

When it seems like
school will never end; when dreams fall through; when mistakes are made; when
the future is unknown I trust in You.

I trust in the God
Who counted Abraham’s faith as righteousness, the God Who loved David, the God Who
revealed Himself to Saul of Tarsus, the God Who sent His only Son to be the world’s Savior.

Learning to watch
and sing in the midst of growing pains; learning to delight in the heart of my Savior,

Love those
cute little guys? Find them here


The Sunday Christian

Dear God,

Am I really, truly

I mean, I’m the
girl who’s saving herself for marriage, the one who tries to be sweet yet
careful around men, the one who you’ve delivered from so many bondages.

But lately, well,
my mind just seems to wander.  

I’m so preoccupied
with every thought but you. Idols seem to popping up everywhere in my mind;
strongholds, though seemingly innocent, are growing stronger and stronger.

You talk about
loving you with all my heart, all my strength, and all my mind. All.

It’s so easy to be
fake with people. I can smile sweetly and talk church talk all day. No one
really sees that deep down inside I’ve let the cup get dirty. No one see the
skeletons shaking about in the closet.

Except you.

You see right
through me. You see right through the religious, vain talk. You see right
through the pretty smile and the aura of piety. You see me: a lonely girl who
is desperately resisting her Lord’s leadership.

Lord, let me be
real. Help me to open the closet to your powerful, life-giving light. Purge me
of the dross which so easily settles within me. Jesus, transform my mind with
your word so that I may be authentic
and pure of heart and mind.

Wanting to be so
much more than a Sunday Christian,

{Find this quote here!}

My Fear of All Things Babies



Most females my age love the little bundles; they like to kiss, hug, and jostle
about the squirming creature and they enjoy cooing and soothing and holding all
the while making it look easy and natural.


I, on the other
hand, am different. Much different.


Put a baby in my
arms and I become as wide-eyed, stiff, and awkward as can be.


Babies scare me.
They’re fragile. Their necks flop about and they are so hard to dress; it took
me forever to learn how to button onsies (so many buttons!) and I’m scared stiff
to pull their little t-shirts over their little faces.


Back in Alaska I’m
known for putting a baby’s diaper on backward.


Toddlers aren’t any
better—instead of enjoying the cute faces they make I spend energy worrying
about whether or not they’ll choke on a carrot or if it’s time to change the


Finally, the birth
process. Oi. I have ever so many questions
about the pregnancy. Don’t get me wrong, I think it is a miraculous event and I
believe motherhood in all its stages is beautiful.  But what about weight gain, labor, pain and
all those doctor visits?


You see, I’ve never
had any little people in the house to take care of. When my sister and I
babysat she would take care of the babies and I would take care of the cleaning;
we made a great team and I relished the chance to avoid those fragile, precious


Last week I had the
chance to visit with a friend who recently had her first baby. We talked about
little things at first; I was afraid becoming a mom had totally changed her.
Then we began to talk about it, the
baby and the birth.


“Was it painful?”


“How has your body


“How did you handle
all those doctors?”


“Was the umbilical
cord . . . creepy?” J Ever since I watched an episode of “I Didn’t Know
I was Pregnant” the umbilical cord has resembled something alive from the SciFi
channel! Eeek!


It was so good for
me to ask real questions and to hear honest answers. It was such relief to know
that pregnancy and labor are hard but well worth it. It was such a blessing to
see how God carried her through her pregnancy and labor and how the pain is now
drifting into the past . . . just like He promised.


So, am I ready to
pick up every baby I see?




But am excited to
see the little ways God molds and changes my heart and soothes my fears?




With love,




          The baby about babies
Like that baby carriage? Me too! Find it here.