Don’t Dig Up in Doubt What You Planted in Faith: Coffee Series

Don't dig up in doubt what you planted in faith with AuthenticVirtue.com

In life we’re given the choice to simply trust and obey or grow faithless and fearful.

In our current situation, I’m constantly challenged by fear. Every belly cramp, sign of blood, or internet search weakens my faith and I begin to dig up in doubt what I had planted in faith.

Last week was no different. My Beloved came home, exhausted from the previous night’s trip to the emergency room, the extra work he had done over the weekend, and being out-of-town. My normally calm and collected Dalton was stressed and worn out. And instead of  helping ease his weary heart I made it heavier through my nervous, worry-edged tone.

Even though we had just been to the doctor who informed us that baby was well, growing and the spotting/bleeding appeared to be low-risk, every hour of the day seemed grow my anxiety and fear. It’s like I need to be jellied up and sitting next to an ultrasound every moment of the day for me to have any peace and rest.

Friends, learn with me. Don’t dig up in doubt what you’ve planted in faith.

Life is full of unknowns.

Thankfully, we can know that God is good and kind and exceedingly present in our time of need. He is faithful to His children, their needs, and He hears their pleas.

Dalton reminded me that besides our false alarm miscarriage, our pregnancy has really been quite problem-free. Yes, I spot but so do a thousand other women who have healthy babies.

So, here’s to Fridays and learning to live life in faith. Here’s to less worry and more trusting and obeying.

What are you learning to let go and trust in? have you any advice or insight in how to conquer fear and anxiety? Let’s grow together and share our hearts! 

Love, blessings, and coffee,

Frannie

 

When Your Love Affair with Getting Your Way Gets Out

Dealing with not getting your way with AuthenticVirtue.com

Have you ever been completely wiped out by your self-will?

Today was one of those days. One moment I’m rejoicing in life then something deep, emotional and fearful sweeps over me. Suddenly, I’m agitated, grumpy and morose. I start fighting Dalton over the most ridiculous conversations. Today’s argument: Do animals sin?

You should have seen the ugliness coming out from me over that unique conversation. (Wait, no, I’m glad you didn’t.)

Dalton pressed his way through the store aisles with his business while I slumped behind feeling like I was out of control and didn’t know why. What’s wrong with me? Am I hormonal? Emotional? Tired? I’m a child of God, I know better then this. I know better then this.

We talked on the drive home. Dalton, I don’t know why I’m acting like this; I don’t know why I’ve been arguing with you all week, I just feel like I have to win even if it’s dumb.

His gentle response? Maybe it’s because you haven’t been getting your way this week. 

Ouch. He’s right. I haven’t been getting my way this week. I’ve had a lot of issues going on this week that crossed my will: a dispute with a family member, Dalton not able to get work off for my mother’s birthday, my relatively tight work schedule which keeps us away for Mother’s Day, plans postponed … and my flesh is hating it.

I feel like I keep my requests to a minimum; as a realist personality I know life has limitations and it requires you to be careful with budgets, making plans and scheduling work. I know these things because I’m a by the rule book kind of gal who respects boundaries and black and white possibilities.

So I’m careful about most of my wishes — I don’t request wild, expensive, impractical things (normally). And in my mind, my frugality deserves being rewarded. When I ask for something I expect to get it. 

UGH. How did that bit of old man survive the sanctification process? How in the world did I miss crucifying that bit of fleshly thinking? How did I allow such selfishness rule my thinking and behavior, unseen, for so long?

It does no good to pout but that’s what I want to do; it feels good to mourn my sinful nature. But I need to fly to the mercy seat of God and let Him pull this ugliness from me. I need to let Him complete the work in me and address my love for my getting my way. He alone can let godly sorrow work good things in me — not days of binge cookie-dough eating and pouting.

I learned relearned a few things today:

  1. Even if you feel justified in getting your way God requires His people to have submissive, meek hearts to His revealed will — even when it means not getting your way.
  2. I’m not there yet. I still have a lot of growing, maturing and sanctification to go and that’s okay.
  3. Marrying husbands who gently point out truth in your life is an absolute gift. (Go for guys like that.)

Friends, can you relate? Tell me what God is revealing in your heart and life right now? Let’s grow together and pray for each other. Leave a comment so we can get started. 

Choosing joy, forgiveness and coffee this evening,

Frannie

Jesus Wants You to Look Up // Coffee Series

Coffee With You Series

Hey, sweet reader.

Yes, you. You may be feeling a little crazy today, a little overwhelmed, a little busy or a little discouraged.

I know. I’ve been there before. I’ve been in the dark place that looking inwardly brings. Many of us tend to peek at our imperfect parts for far too long. We get lost in the the fact that we’re still lacking, still angry, still sinning, still fearful, still full of pride.

I get it. I really do.

But there’s no sunshine in the dungeon. Friend, look up. Lift your eyes to Jesus — the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.

He counted the cost of the cross and endured its pain and shame. He did that so we could know our Heavenly Father and live in His freedom. Friend, we’re free from continual condemnation and free from the never ending pursuit of self and sin.

Jesus is all that we need @ AuthenticVirtue.com

Live in the sunshine and breathe in the finished work of Jesus Christ in your life. After all, He is all that we need.

But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption 

With love, blessings and coffee,

Frannie

3 Treasure-Filled Lessons Marriage Has Taught Me

Authentic Virtue

It’s been one beautiful adventure, my marrying Dalton. Today, we celebrate our 2nd wedding anniversary. For the last 731 days I’ve grown more in love with a man who is an obvious God-send.

Last year, I wrote a post titled 55 Things I’ve Learned After Being Married One Year. This year I feel a little less ambitious and long-winded. 😉 Here are my three most recent, most life-altering lessons marriage has taught me.

[pullquote width=”300″ float=”left”]It’s Okay to be Delighted In[/pullquote] Silly, isn’t it? We yearn to be loved but when the chance comes we freeze. Our minds swirl with dangerous ideas: no one could love me, no one could adore my faulty body, no one could find me irresistible — I’m not worthy enough. We push our husbands away and forsake their genuine, God-given delight in us.

Sweet one, stop. I’ve been there; I’ve doubted my husband’s words, ignored his truth and resisted being fully loved by him. I was afraid. It’s scary letting someone take full delight in you — they might find a flaw.

Dare to take the risk. Dare to fall into your Adam’s arms and dare to be his Eve. Believe that the love he has for you is the gift that it is and rejoice in it.

[pullquote width=”300″ float=”left”]It’s Okay to Love Fully[/pullquote] Okay, okay. I know this is strange. Somehow, in my single years, I developed the idea that it was wrong to be as in love with my husband as I am now. It wasn’t spiritual to make him my priority. It was embarrassing to be radiantly, happily in love. The vulnerability of having a person I’m loyal to above all made me sickeningly weak.

Crazy, right?

It wasn’t until I read Song of Solomon that I realized my error. We’ve been given permission to love our husbands fully — it’s good to be ravishingly, totally enthralled with our person. Love isn’t supposed to be conservative. It’s generously visable to the world.

[pullquote width=”300″ float=”left”]It’s Okay to be Weak  [/pullquote] Someone very dear spoke these words of life to me: receiving criticism doesn’t mean you failed, it means you have room to grow.

Marriage will reveal weakness. And, if you have an addiction to perfection like me, you can imagine the horror of having someone see you for the human that you are.

It’s okay.

Sweet friend, it’s okay to be weak. It’s okay to need forgiveness, restoration, and grace. That’s why Christ came. [pullquote width=”300″ float=”left”]And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.[/pullquote]

Two years married to a person who sees all my selfishness, greed and pride has been hard on the side of me that wants self-made righteousness — but it’s been good for the part of me that needs grace.

Reader, whether you’re married or not, I hope you know that it is okay to be delighted in, it’s okay to love fully, and it’s okay to be weak. When we learn to accept these truths life becomes treasure-filled; you may even wonder how you ever thought yourself happy before, these truths are that rewarding.

For a montage of our wedded bliss and a shot of us as a happy, watermelon-wearing couple, why not friend me on Facebook at Authentic Virtue Blog or on my own profile!

With love, blessings and one very happy, well-loved heart,

Frannie

Making Marriage Fun

A Simple How-To: Make Marriage Fun

In just fourteen days I’ll be celebrating my 2nd wedding anniversary with my Darling Dalton. What a joyous gift marriage is meant to be!

Amazingly, our marriage is this strange mixture of feeling like we’ve only just begun and feeling like our anniversary number should be much higher then it is. Of course we’ve had hard days but those can be expected and we wade through them together, hand-in-hand.

Making marriage fun is one way we’ve been able to walk through the hard times with joy and smiles — learning to make fun with your man is something I encourage every committed, womanly soul to do.

[pullquote width=”300″ float=”left”]Laugh with your man [/pullquote] It’s incredibly simple. Laughing with your husband is one of the quickest ways to remembering who you married and why.

Life is hard, to-do lists long, and disappointments inevitable. But if you can remember to make time to giggle with your spouse over the kid’s funny sayings, belly-laugh together through a good movie, or dance a silly tango in the kitchen together you’ll be able to wade through the difficult times with a happier heart and a fresher mind.

Plus, your man thrives on your laughing with him. Have you noticed your beloved’s soul shriveling and withering? Reflect on how much laughter you’ve been sending his way. Husbands often love an audience but he wants his #1 fan to be the lovely creature he chose to wed.

[pullquote width=”300″ float=”left”]Kiss your Man[/pullquote] Have any of you ever forgotten to buy basic necessities like eggs, bread or toothpaste when you’re at the grocery store? Why? Because they’re the every day items you didn’t need to mark down on your shopping list. If you’re like me you probably think you’ll be able to remember to buy these every-day necessities.

(And, if you’re like me, you’ll always forget them unless you make a list!) 😉

Same goes for kissing. We women can get so busy conquering life that we forget to do the littlest things which make marriage grow, including making our men know they are loved!

Make your marriage fun by reviving the art of kissing. Kiss him in the morning, kiss him on his way out, kiss him when he get’s home and gross the kids out by laying good one on him before dinner. 😉

It’s fun, it’s memory-making, and it’s the perfect way to get his attention! 😀

p.s. If you need some inspiration do visit Sheila’s Ten Kisses Every Marriage Needs . It’s great!

[pullquote width=”300″ float=”left”]Be his Delight[/pullquote] I have a confession: some how I picked up this crazy idea that it was demeaning to me, as a woman, to pursue and enjoy being my husband’s delight. I felt like I was unfulfilled if I made his delight my priority.

Thankfully, this little lie didn’t last long in our marriage. God reveled to me that there is great delight in being my husband’s delight. It was a good thing to be enjoyable! 😉

This is the #1 way I would recommend to have fun within marriage. Learn to be enjoyable. No one wants to be married to a sourpuss, unthankful woman, unhappy woman. Enjoy the rewards of being your husband’s delight and, sweet woman, there are many! It may take time but choosing to be a delight to your man will strengthen and grow your marriage because it’s fun and perfectly wonderful.

How do you make your marriage fun? For all you wonderful single ladies tell me what you are looking forward to in making marriage fun. I love hearing from you!

Love, blessings and coffee,

Frannie