I love lists and matchmaking is no exception. For years I imagined my perfect man would be tall, brown-eyed and owning his own business by the time he was twenty-five. We’d farm, throw out the tv and sell our belongings to buy the plane tickets to become oversea missionaries.
You can imagine my surprise when God sent the opposite my direction. Now, 20 months into one glorious, beautiful marriage with my best friend, I’m so thankful I wasn’t allowed to hand-pick my man.
Because, #tbh, I would have married at least five different blokes before I made up my mind. 😉
Marriage has taught me a few things and today I want to share five signs of a good man. The list is extremely simple and exceptionally old fashioned but I’ve found that simple is most often best — even in marriage.
Visible Love for the Lord
Before you ever say “yes” to a first date check the guy out. (And I don’t mean his bod, gals.) 😉 Check his life out. Ask his friends, authorities and family questions about who he is. Take the time to see if his profession of Christianity is fruitful; does his life speak of a genuine love for the Lord? This is the time to play detective, girls.
Before my Beloved ever asked me out I listened closely to what others said of him. I asked questions. I took a look into his reputation. The results encouraged me to allow Dalton to pursue me — everyone said that he was quiet with a quirky personality and that he was known for being hardworking, dedicated to purity, pursuing Christ and filled with a generous soul.
I definitely liked what I heard! 😉
I never knew how integral humility was until my Husband apologized to me for the first time. Immediately I sensed that he was far more concerned with loving me than his pride.
Ladies, you will be marrying a man who will sin (even if he’s your Prince Charming!). Look for a man who is willing to confess his sins to the Lord and ask your forgiveness when he’s wronged you.
Now, I’m not talking about looking for a man you can manipulate into saying he’s sorry for any thing. I mean finding a man who is serious enough and humble enough to recognize that he needs his Savior every day and who acknowledges that he makes mistakes.
This may seem like a petty thing to look for but it’s a lifesaver! Schedules can be exhausting and days are long. Look for someone who will laugh with you even when life feels like it’s swallowing you up.
Of course no two senses of humor are alike but finding a man who can pray with you one moment and then dance the tango with you next is a delightful treat.
Finding a man who is brave and loving enough to speak the truth is a true treasure. I love that I can rest in knowing that Dalton and I have no secrets and that his word is solid. I mean, I value his word more than buckets of gold. He’s proven himself true … even when it hurts.
Of course, an honest man will not always say what people want him to hear; however, I’ve found that a man who speaks the truth because he is loving and honest will never intend to bring harm with his words. He will simply speak the truth gently and confidently.
Finally, one last quality I believe marks a good man is a strong work ethic. Look for a man who not only works to provide but who enjoys working for works sake. This looks different for all men and may take time as they discover their talents and skills. However, finding a man who chooses to joyfully provide for his family is an awesome thing!
I by no means want this to become “your checklist” or guide in relationships — please don’t do that! Instead I want to bless you with a bit of insight on five things that make marriage really tick.
I know I have been extraordinarily blessed by these five traits and praise God He sent me such a gem for a husband.
What do you think makes a good man? If you’re married tell us what trait you found delightful in your husband!
With love, blessings and coffee!
photo credit belongs to the beautiful Amelia Protiva Photography