Duking It Out // What God Really Expects Us To Do

I know it isn’t a popular thing but I’m going to say it:

I am more blessed, more happy and more in love when I honor and submit to my Husband.

About a month ago, D and I’s opposing opinions came to Mexican-standstill. I mean, there were enough cold stares, debates and tumbleweeds to make our little home look like the setting for a John Wayne movie.

(I hate to admit it but I was the antagonist in this movie … but are not all antagonists the heroes in their own minds? Because I know I thought I was the hero … )

Needless to say we could not agree. And I was shocked! Here was my Mr. Steady, my gentle, thoughtful man holding his ground, demanding respect. To my surprise (and maybe horror? 😉 I watched the Command Man come to the surface. Quite honestly, I did not like it.

I was concerned with what was right, what was just, in his decision and I was certain he was wrong. To make matters worse my Husband simply stated his peace and left it at that. I was suited and ready for war and one cannot commence a battle of wits when the opposer refuses to fight. Thus, tears came, anger seethed and bewilderment fogged my judgment.

I then remembered two important things:

1) In any disagreement, it isn’t my perspective that I should be looking through. It’s the opposing one which deserves my honor and attention … if I want any chance of resolution.

Even though I did not agree with my Beloved I had to acknowledge his perspective and feelings on the issue. Ignoring his thoughts would be the perfect ingredient for a bitter, unresolved stew … and I don’t really care for stew.

2) In any disagreement with my Husband, I can state my peace but with the courage to obey God’s Word and honor and reverence my Husband and the decision he ends up with.

We women can fight till we are blue in the face, many of us do. But that is not what God calls us to do. We can stand on the Mount of Justice, determined to make our husbands do what we think is right; sometimes, we’ll even convince them that it is sin to do otherwise (woe unto us!).

Instead, let us be women of God and obey His Word which reads, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let wives be to their own husbands in everything.”

I am not an athletic woman but I am competitive. My sinful, natural side cannot stand to lose. Sometimes, submitting myself to my husband can feel like a loss. Not so! By honoring and submitting myself to my husband I am obeying God and one thing I know is that obedience to the Lord is never a loss. When I obey God by honoring and submitting myself to my husband I gain, I win. I win my Darlings enduring love, I win respect from a man who has enough sense to know submission isn’t always easy, I win the freedom to share my thoughts without fear of repression or denial. Submitting my will to my Darling Man isn’t a loss, it’s a win.

Next time we disagree I hope I won’t load my gun and tumbleweeds won’t scoot across the kitchen floor; instead of a standstill I want there to be open communication and, above all, I want my Darling to feel safe and respected by his wife. He has always told me he will listen to my thoughts so there is no need to put on the chaps and duke it out.

Because nobody wants to feel like this. And because I am more blessed, more happy and more in love when I honor and submit to my Husband.

With love, blessings and a yummy cup of coffee,


p.s. please click on the pictures for their source. 🙂

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